@mike4g

i agree there are so many hoaks in this country imagine the number of prank calls you got asking you or even asking you for certain details

even the banks have a way of moving your money that when lost cant explain and cant do nothing with it. i know someone who did months of digging only to find a glitch in their system so his money got back and funny that how it was move without his authorization.

@daithi . . . . if you would be nice introduce me to some and while your at it teach me to how break the ice in this culture hahaa

@annie wang . . . i think i agree, its all perspective and actually common interest and how you approach and personality.

@peter99 .. . i in someway agree, but as all women do or is . . . they also try to picture themselves with you or in that perspective. but i think the problem with this culture is the commitment thing or sticking with you for the good and bad. can you blame a one child policy that ends up often being selfish?

@neddy, my thoughts on your reply would be im sure there is a reason why she choose that kind of guy without the money, im sure that guy has some money but in the way has other stuff that just makes her happy or in chinese . .. ke yi le

if you guys know a chinese girl that is sweet and lovable which im sure is temperamental plus selfish and has a instinct of annoying you with their way of telling you how to do things which just ticks and turns me off.

i had my encounters, this girl has a car and its really cold -1 that night, i was at mickey D's where it was warm, i waited for more than a hour there then when she was done ask me to get out of mcdo to go to the entrance of where she park. i was already a bit ticked, but here i am gone out she told me from the door go left and straight and i will see the entrance another wait of 10 minutes before the damn thing got out but i got a call because it was the wrong direction its from her angle of left so its should be my right from the door then straight. i cant believe we argued and end up she just coming to mcdonalds. im like why couldnt you just come to the place at the first place, its cold and you want me standing here in the cold. and funny that when she first called she said she is done and about to leave the complex and wants me there at the entrance of the parking. i just wish i brought my car instead

@alien,

if that is so, then i stand corrected :D

my take is this, its pretty tough for a guy to show emotions in this culture. it does not in any way get better for him because of expectations and living up to it

if there a need to show of emotions for them does not guarantee that can lead to a great relationship if the test for looking for a partner comes more of initially showing physical things like not just a stable job but a high paying one, i mean the norm of the salary here is kunming if you get 3-4k a month its already consider high. so go out with a woman or a girl in this stage now in kunming im betting you would be spending around 1-2k a month with gifts or not depends on your creativity.

aside from the job, it doesnt hurt your chances more if you get to have cars or your own place, but the fact is the effort your showing means how much your willing to spend.

honestly, some chinese women would be loud or blunt like a chinese girl i know throw this out saying, would you be happier to know your husband makes 4k and gives you 3k a month as to a husband who makes 10k a month but just gives you 3k a month. as to those silent type which would say im not looking for the rich type or i dont have high standards for men as long as he love me. loves here is not just the time you give but the effort you do like gifts, could be not expensive or the way she is treated in the princess feeling you can give. if you dont get me on the second type its just she doesnt say she wants tht and that but when the time you buy her stuff she is happy even if its the simple things or not expensive all the time.

after all that the expectations to be treated or pampered, im not saying chinese women are bad its just the way it is since mostly are a single child so what do you expect from them but be greedy or selfish. i mean they do admit it you know. so it comes to the fact that when they are sick you rush to their home and be with them or give them medicines or whatever.

so why there should be a need for emotions when its like that kind of effort, i mean yeah you can be corky or funny, cheap food or drinks those work if you want a date or just dating but to hit the homerun or take home the prom queen it takes much more than that.

before you get to the emotions stage, the primary issue to get started has nothing much to do with it especially a large chunk of it is at the start.