Sorry....LOL!

Ok, I agree with some on here saying this is more of a "do not marry KM Dragon's wife" more than a "do not marry Chinese". Yea I agree there are a dozen chinese that'll rip you to pieces. I hate to break it to you, but I have about 1 Chinese friend I practically call part of the family for every 15-20 people I call friend.

There's a LOT of ends to cover in this. First thing's obvious, most chinese are only child, and thus think they need to be propped up on a golden pedestal as their parents did for them growing up. Another I find is this attraction to material wealth (money, jade, jewelry, teddy bears). They grow up with the belief that men are pussies (seriously I was at a net bar last night and there's a dude streaming young gay porn vids on 1 computer and another playing LOL while loudly singing along with Hannah Montana and Lady Gaga).

I dont know if you've already done somethin about your relationship?

First, I would suggest try making life more interesting. Do things together. FUN things. Hell if I were back in Kunming I'd be dragging my chick off to play mini golf or to a theme park somewhere.

Second, I agree that before marriage you should live together, but I've been hit with the speech more than once that guy/girl unmarried sharing a place is unnatural.

Third, don't use the reflective mirror technique. Yelling and throwin shit is only going to increase the tension. You know what I'd do if a chick did that to me? I'd fuckin run at them, tackle 'em, and give them a big hug.

Fourth, you were told this by your dad or bros when you first began dating. There's millions of fish in the sea. IF things are not working, it's time to start asking WHY you are in this shit hole in the first place? It's time to consider just walkin out the door and never lookin back. Chicks do it all the time to us, and we always go crawlin back with apologies, right? I'm not saying you should pull the same tactic. What I am saying is actually consider leaving because an uhealthy relationship is gonna cause you a lifetime of stress and stress causes age and early death. Dude, if you managed to get this girl, I'm assuming then you're somewhat successful (have a job, money, etc). My point is, just walk outside and you'll find another chick that wants a relationship with a stable man in a snap.

ON the healthy relationship thing, I'm not sure how true this fact is. I was watching a youtube fact vid about aging and longevity which claimed that being single is actually better for your health than being hitched. Of course, the next piece of advice was if you DO hitch, make it work. I don't think the point is you should be a single player. I think what they're saying is sometimes having some "me" time and just chilling with friends is important. I've heard it a dozen times; one who smiles lives longer than one who frowns or cries. I guess that's why deep in our hearts we choose to major in something that we find interesting, we search for a job we find that we love, we desire in our hearts to be happy by the belief that owning an expensive sports car parked in front of a beach house is the ultimate dream. Ultimately, life is about being happy, and if you're not in a happy place, then it's time to pack your suitcase and move.

Don't look back with regret. Life's a 1 time deal. It's short. Live it. Love it. Laugh.

Nobody's gonna kill you, and if ANYONE does it will most likely be the government. :P

The fighting is between Buddhist biker gangs and muslims. Nothing new in the world as Muslims are really being thrown on the global shit list of the decade.

The good news is the terrorist cells of the mid east are not involved, as such it's all infighting. They try not to involve foreigners in their business. Some tribal groups that the government deems "dangerous" are actually Obama worshippers. The reason that curfews and things go into effect are not because you are in danger, but because the government wants you out of their way. The only real danger you'll face in Myanmar is if you take a walk in the countryside tall grass. Snakebite is one of the highest reports of hospitalization.

Dude you need to take a deep breath, relax, and chill.

This may sound stupid, but it has a point. IS being late to something really that important that you'll risk your life?

Anyways, you came to China. This is not "home", so you must learn to take these little things with the salt and throw it over your shoulder. When in Rome, do as the romans do. You don't see Chinese running around flippin the bird at every crosswalk.

Yes I know the little things are fucking annoying. I've been here for nearly 4 damn years, life has been hell as opposed to "comfortable living in a cozy apartment with a job that pays 10K". Every job I've held here has been around the 5K line in the big cities. I do my best at my job because that's all I can do, yet I still feel like I'm getting the dirt treatment. I put up with the little annoyances in China, I put up with the constant complaints from my family that supports me a little each month always yelling, "When are you going to be independent!?" I've got debt past my ears back home that needs paid. You're lucky you have a wife beside you to support your beliefs and give an extra hand. I only have myself. Women and I don't work out here because I have that curse of always ending up going to a movie one night, and then walking around a shopping mall the next week pointing out interesting outfits (friend zoned), and I ask myself where the hell I went wrong from being the man to being...the gay man?

I have big dreams I'd like to have my own business, I'd like to have a boat, I'd like to someday fly, I'd like to have a nice house and family, I'd like to have a good life. You want to know the truth? I've lived in a damn KFC for the past 5 days, using the free internet in starbucks, lost my passport, have no money, and really beginning to wonder if THIS is my lowest point? Or was it another time when I had to walk home from Pudong Airport in Shanghai for 12 fuckin hours in the rain because there was no fuckin bus stop across the road, and every taxi out there was full!

You think you have it rough? I'm stuck between a rock and a fuckin hard place. Stay here life seems miserable because no matter how hard I try I am cursed to be slapped with bad luck. Go home, and this cancer survivor ends up being a common Walmart stock boy for pennies while watching people he knows go 6ft under from cancer left and right.

Welcome to my shoes!

Alright, anyways, enough with the chit chat. Seriously man, you need to relax. You have good things going for you, man. You've got a decent job, a wife, kids?, and your whole life ahead of you. Next time you see some shit happen, think of what you have. Also, think how funny China is. Its like living in a Dr Seuss fantasy land where everything is opposite, backwards, and strange.

Next thing I want you to do is to turn off that lamp beside your comfy bed, kiss your wife, and IF you continue having these urges of anger along with feelings of depression you should consider visiting a therapist as you may be Bipolar. It's not a bad thing if you have it, and what I'm saying is if you do it's best to get help for you and your family.

Have a good sleep.

@alexkmg FEW speak English, and the ones I ran into mostly spoke for career purposes. I'd go into hotels and ask for directions to the bus, and they'd tell me their rates for the night. I managed to find 1 guy that understood me, but he always kept saying there's no bus today, only tomorrow. I'm not sure if he meant because it was midnight? Or if he meant that the bus ran every other day. The other people I met that could speak on par with me were the police and immigration officials.

@Alien Muse was just the first step in my journey. I was planning to reach Yangon to visit a friend that owed me money. If you are an avid backpacker to Bangkok guesthouses, then I'm sure you might have seen other backpackers meeting a local friend for business. Also, I'm not talking drugs. That kind of business I find difficult, and the punishment in some places is execution.

@Asanee Wow! Thanks for the tip! The guy I know on the other side just said, "hop the fence at night, get a bus to Yangon." There's no place I can find a map which would tell me how to get to the bus station once over. There's so little information on Muse online. I thought there would be a checkpoint into Burma on the other side. Also, the African's story sounds interesting. How did he do it? I know you said he had Chinese friends, but what can Chinese do in Myanmar? I plan to go back to Myanmar in the future. I hear it's becoming the new "Las Vegas" of southeast asia. Ever since opening it's doors, investors have been flocking there. Also, it has a huge underground trafficking network that sells women to Chinese farmers looking for a wife. I've also heard that they have underage prostitution where one can find a teen for $100. I'm not saying I'd go for the prostitution, but usually sin city exists for a reason. Maybe low cost of living? Numerous opportunities attracting the super rich from western nations that hunger for exotic pleasures along with business? My point is, China is mostly developed, and the casual jobs for foreigners are either gone or transformed into something requiring PhD qualifications. I think Vietnam and Myanmar might be the next "frontier".

Anyone want to know about the border crossing?

When you get to Ruili,, get a cab go to the big gate. Get out, and walk through the jade shop. Other side, stroll down the road towards the fence, and walk along it. You're gonna see some holes with locals climbing through shrubbery. Not a pleasant crossing point as there's another wall on the opposite side. If you continue, and past the next checkpoint, everything becomes rural. Out there is a hole that leads to a guy building a new house in the middle of nowhere. I think there is a very deep ravine somewhere in the weeds.

Go back to the starting point, and this time walk left. There's a hole behind a power station/box that many locals use. Just climb up, and slip through landing on the soft ground on the other side. That's all backyards for shops and a KTV parlor. You want to aim for a gap between the buildings. Be prepared. You need to toss your bag over first, then long jump the ravine that runs under the houses to make it to the main road on the other side in Muse.

If you choose to continue left instead of taking that hole, there's another one in the middle of a road and on the Muse side it has a little sidewalk that leads to an alley with shantys. If you follow the alley to the right, you'll eventually make it to the main road.

My word of warning to the explorer, if you choose to cross through the hole rather than the official checkpoint, you are responsible for your own actions. When I was there, people knew I was a white guy. I'd ask for directions to the bus station while walking down "main street" in the middle of the night. I made many mistakes. First, knowing where you're going is an advantage. If you need to ask people for advice ask someone an hours walk away. Also, try to ask as FEW people as possible. Don't walk down main street very often. Don't walk at midnight I believe there's a sort of curfew.

Be wary of anyone says they're police. I settled on a step in front of a closed shop, and 2 biker dudes stopped. They came over said they were police and wanted to see my passport. The one guy was dressed like a civilian biker bum, while the other was wearing a dirtied jacket with a patch. I got up and told them I was leaving, and they left me alone, but whatever you do be warned that there may be some that pretend to be police to steal your passport.

On that note, also be warned of real police driving civilian cars and wearing civilian clothes. 3 dudes out for a late night drive pulled up alongside me, and said they were police asked if I needed help. Then they asked to see my ID. I tried same trick with the biker dudes, but this time they followed me to the hotel I walked to. They asked the manager if I was staying there, and when he said no it's full, I said I was going to the next hotel. They hopped in their car, and drove there before me. They ran in and talked with management before I could even walk up the sidewalk.

Be warned that police are strict as nails there. They will not hesitate to toss a foreigner in a cell. Add to that, I could tell they were strong too. The immigration officer arrived with 2 uniformed Burmese police that were built like American football linebackers while wearing sandals. Taking into account police are wearing sandals is a clue that a guy in sneakers probably can't outrun these guys.

I got off easy and they took me back to the hole in the fence and shoved me back into China. I can't say they'll do the same for the next foreigner that strays over the boundary.