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The reason why I came to Kunming (over the summer)

gaoxing (63 posts) • 0

I traveled to Kunming because I had "yellow fever." I have always had my eye on Chinese girls.

I thought I was going to get laid like a rock star in Kunming, but that really didn't work out. The language barrier and a few other things led to my downfall.

However, I decided to not give up and booked a one way ticket to Hong Kong. I am not a big fan of big cities and I decided to stay away from the city areas of HK and I stayed in places like the village of Mui Wo on Lantau Island.

My dreams came true when I started talking to a Chinese girl, who could speak fluent English, staying at my hotel. I ended going on several dates with her and she ended up letting me stay at her parent's house. Her family cooked me authentic Chinese food (my stomach agreed with it unlike Kunming's Chinese food) and her family washed my clothes every week.

If I would have known it was easier to hook up with Chinese girls in Hong Kong, I would have never bothered spending time in Kunming, granted Kunming is a lot cheaper than HK.

Kunming is a tough place to live in my opinion unless you have some really good friends who can speak Chinese and you know how to navigate through the Chinese system of doing things, making deals, and living life.

I wish I could be like the guys that run Salvador's. Those guys know how to speak Chinese fluently and probably have a ton of connections in the area. I'm sure they could get laid like rock stars if they wanted to.

The only thing I didn't like about Salvador's was the fact that a lot of cliques seem to congregate their on a daily basis.

AnnAurora (36 posts) • 0

Hahaha I don't even know where to start. Ignoring the fact that you actually went to China to get laid, I must say that I am not surprised that you prefere Hong Kong since you don't speak any Chinese. However I don't know if it is necessary for you to find a girl who speaks English since you only seem to care about her being willing to have sex with you and do your laundry.

Your message seems to be that you advice people to go Hong Kong instead of Kunming because it's easier to get laid there. Well if you as a Western man travel to China with the sole purpose of getting laid without any basic knowledge of China or Chinese, then living in Hong Kong is probably easier. And hopefully you will stay there.

laotou (1714 posts) • 0

GX
Well - unaldulterated poon tang desires aside - at least you're bluntly and rather brutally honest. This current post makes you sound like less of a lascivious poon hound and more like you were just looking for ONE nice chinese girl.

Kunming is definitely a backwoods-y place, extremely rural in culture. It takes time, patience, and perseverance to survive in a place where virtually nobody speaks english and Kunming locals barely speak the national putonghua dialect.

Aside from the cost of living - it's actually easier for non-asians to get FWB in Tokyo or other asian metropolitan cities - and the J-girls speak a reasonably intelligible garbled smattering of English - ESPECIALLY if you're tall, blond, blue eyes, etc - all the attributes of the legendary "foreigner". It's easier to pigeon-english your way around Tokyo taxis than Kunming - where even other chinese (example Taiwan/Fujian) have to repeat destination names several times. The drawback is big city people seem to come with many many more complications.

That said - just beware the shotgun wedding unless you'd like to drift into that situation also. Best wishes - hope you can make a peaceful and contented new life for yourself in the land of candy (temptation).

As for Salvador's cliques - drift in, drift out - never depend on other's for assistance - especially in a foreign country - you'll be happier and stronger from the independence. Salvador's - like any other restaurant/bar is a business - they don't specialize in hand holding - they're a for-profit joint that specializes in selling booze and food to expats.

I see from your posts you were extremely frustrated in your quest for - well, whatever you quested. Enjoy the peace - country girls can be really nice, uncomplicated, long-term marriageable material (or they can be your worst demon from hell). Choose wisely - when you find the jewel you seek - treat her well.

aiyaryarr (122 posts) • 0

Gaoxing,

Earlier, I complimented you in another thread on your honesty (blunt & extreme) and consistency (negative). Because I believe these are virtues since they show where you are coming from without disguise.

Having read your 2 most recent posts in separate threads, I may have to take back the consistent one. If I believe your blunt honesty about your feelings toward Chinese people that you have posted in GoKunming Forum, why is it that you choose a Chinese woman as your mate (or should I use the word "victim")? If your only objective is to get laid, why choose Kunming instead of the relatively more cosmopolitan Shenzhen or Shanghai, where you are likely to find more people who speak some English to increase your odds?

As for your HK achievement that in such a short time since you've been in HK and just talking to "a" (one?) girl and you've hit the jackpot? I find that hard to believe. Finding someone who speaks fluent English outside of HK's Central or Tsim Sha Tsui Districts, and of all places at a little village on Lantau Island is also remarkable. Your new girl friend must not work in Central or Tsim Sha Tsui because the commute makes it unlikely & even implausible. Chinese families usually warm up slowly and, particularly in HK, do not behave like what you've written in the tale of your new life in HK, unless you are an exceptional catch or they have an ulterior motive. Even then, if they eventually learn from your "honesty", I gather the scenery will change.

For your everlasting happiness, I wish you all the best and hope I am wrong in the above assessment.

blobbles (958 posts) • 0

Well, I came to Kunming to learn Chinese, not to meet Chinese girls as I had recently broken up from a long term relationship and didn't want to start anything new. Three weeks later I have a Chinese girlfriend (a sweet, loving and beautiful gal whose English is average, but rapidly improving... and I am short and bald, still with blue eyes though!) AND are learning Chinese and really like Kunming. It sounds like, gaoxing, that you came here looking just for sex - I think that most girls anywhere know when a man is only interested in sex and are themselves not interested, so will fein not knowing any English and basically think you are an idiot. If you are interested in a real long term relationship with a Chinese girl you should want to understand her culture, language, family and (important with any girl!) her as a person. Not simply her as an object to fulfill your whims.

Frankly its a bit dispicable for you to go to foreign countries just to chase tail. This behaviour seems to have gained some acceptance in the west due to the amount of men doing it in places like Thailand, Vietnam and Cambodia. Nevertheless it is still morally reprehensible and any man wanting to do so should take a long hard look at himself. Sure the over feminisation of the west and the "female in control" social/sexual/relationship dynamic found in the west alienates men. But you must see that coming to a place just to get your end off damages yourself, the country where you are doing it, the locals opinions of the west and the girls that you involve in your activities. I would suggest if you are really interested in meeting a Chinese girl for a long term relationship, do like many ex-pats do and come and UNDERSTAND China first plus learn the language. That will give you a new perspective on life and love plus give you a much greater chance of finding a nice Chinese girl.

gaoxing (63 posts) • 0

Many of you on here said I should have learned Chinese. Well, Chinese is a tough language to learn. I took a semester of Chinese before I graduated from college a few years ago but that was all I had to guide me along in Kunming.

I heard a lot of stories about how the language schools in China are nothing but a bunch of ripoffs.

I was so stressed out in Kunming. I was depressed, angry, and on the verge of beating the crap out of everyone, but I am glad I booked that one way ticket to Hong Kong. HK saved me, literally. HK is more foreigner friendly in my opinion. I was able to get a bite to eat and do some exploring without having to worry.

The women in HK are TOP NOTCH! I almost got whiplash walking around HK. My head was constantly moving from side to side.

I am no longer in HK. I went back to my homeland a few months ago.

I think I would have enjoyed Kunming more if I had some friends there. It's hard to make friends in Kunming.

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