thanks to all guy for your answers.

Just that my question was more specific, the problem here is not be vegetarian i China, as you guys said is easy and doable, especially if you can speak enough Chinese yo explain it and if you get the wrong order, 算了, you try your best, for that i don't have problem. The real problem, maybe i didn't express it well, is be accept as vegetarian and non drinker in China.

For example, your girlfriend accept you but her parents for traditional reason no, so when you go to their home and they see you that you don't eat ther lovely pork or beef and you stop them while they will put meat in your plate with their chopsticks (this is very important in Chinese sharing food culture, you must eat everything somoboy give you in your plate) they will get upset and they will point out that you are ruining the atmosphere, or even they will arguing that a family cannot be rise without meat and sharing food.
The other problem is the GanBei, so when everybody show respect to each others by cheering, say something and pour beer in your glass, if you don't drink you will spoil the "tradition", maybe this will be no problem with your friends but with your boss or gf's parents it is. At least it is for my gf's parents so for this i would like to know about your girlfriend or boyfriend parents or your boss, are they the same or can you refused to drink beer at KTV restaurant etc.?

Anyway, again thanks for your links and veg restaurants places.

I went to a wedding recently, and nobody on our table ganbei'd with alcohol, we used soup, tea, and juice. It was not a problem.
Regards the meal, maybe your gf did not really explain to her parents first. If she did then maybe the parents are not really accepting of you, and that is the real issue. Either than or her father is a bit of a knuckle head, and if that is the case, you can expect problems all the way, even after you marry.

Chinese people today are used to people not drinking alcohol. Even in back waters like Yunnan. Doctors orders, or driving are acceptable reasons for not imbibing here. Even when drinking with the boss. And as pointed out, many people here are non meat eaters for religious or health reasons. Socially, both are really non issues.

Peer pressure can be a difficult thing to go against, but its just like your parents or teachers may have told you when you were a teenager: just because others around you are doing it, doesn't mean you have to follow them.

I guess everyone everywhere would get upset it you strictly refused to take a toast with them.
Fill your glass with juice, soda or water before a ganbei. You aren't upsetting 5000 years of tradition. Lots of people do that at business meetings, parties, weddings, KTV.

Everyone everywhere would also get upset if you strictly refused to eat any of the food prepared at a family meal you're invited to.
It's your responsibility to communicate to your girlfriend what you can or cannot eat and to ask her to tell that to her parents in case you're invited to a dinner at her family's home. Chinese eat a lot of pork, but also tons of tofu and stir-fried vegetables, so you have enough food to choose from.

Phrase 感情有,茶当酒 gan qing you, cha dang jiu works every time when I don't want to drink alcohol. Chinese think it's funny that I can say it and me not drinking doesn't spoil the mood. So I just ganbei with tea or any other non-alcoholic drink available. Try it next time :)
I'm not a big fan of meat in general, I only sometimes eat fish and chicken, so I also struggled with people putting really greasy bits of beef or pork on my plate. When that happens I usually lie that I have very sensitive stomach and my doctor says I cannot eat red meat. Most of the Chinese cares about health, so they accept it and just load my bowl with tofu, vegetables etc.

I don't think it's a big problem to be vegetarian in China. There are loads of vegetable and tofu dishes and a lot of delicious fruit.
Refusing to eat something never angered any of my Chinese friends. Maybe the problem is not your refusal but how you do it?

I've been living in Kunming for 5 years now and I've been vegan 9 years. Compared to Mediterranean countries, in China is much easier to be vegan as a social point of view. Anywhere you go you will always meet people who know nothing about the subject, look you weird, make fun of you, and so on but in general in china people tend to respect it and understand it. Maybe even more in Kunming where Buddhist culture is so extended. Today you can find more than 100 vegetarians/vegan restaurants in Yunnan, most of them located in Kunming.

At the beginning is always difficult because you have to adapt, learn how to order food, how to make it clear that you don't want meat in your dish, knowing where the vegan restaurants are, etc and you often end up in places where customer service is very bad, they don't care and no matter how clear you say it they'll end up messing it. But also it happened so many times where a group of people agreed to go to a vegan restaurant, most for the first time, to try something new, to be nice letting you chose the place or to eat healthy once in a while. This never happened in my home country. I feel like Chinese people are much more open minded.

And this restaurants are always full. They are cheap, good healthy food and clean so you won't loose face taking your friends there.

In all those years I never cared what people would say if I didn't want to eat meat or drink alcohol or smoke. If people get mad because of these they have a big problem themselves, no matter if it's cultural or what. No culture-religion-tradition-superstition can never be more important than not killing or consuming harming products. And they will never find a valid argument to justify it because it doesn't exist.
Someone that criticizes you and doesn't want to be with you because you don't want to harm others and you want a healthy lifestyle then no need to waste time with them. Not worth it.

Tolerant, intelligent, nice people will always understand. My ex girlfriend after a short time with me she realized it was a logical, good lifestyle. Then her parents understood it too and became vegetarian. Many friends of my ex also started changing their lifestyle. But it's also how much effort you put in it and how important it is for you. A lot of people are just lazy and not willing to make any change because it's just easier this way. Don't let them drag you in their laziness. Being vegan requires work anywhere you are because you always have to go against the crowds and most of the time you are alone against the common lies spread worldwide like a plague. This happens with the meat/dairy industry and so many other subjects anyway.

When dealing with the social aspect it depends how strict you want to be. In my case if the restaurant is going to be one filled with meat I just don't go. If they change the restaurant so everyone can eat then great, if not never mind. If it's like a wedding where is not that good not to attend I'll eat before going and once there just eat some peanuts. Food in weddings is not good anyway (always ending in so much waste) so better eat before going.

If I'm with other people I always suggest vegan restaurants first. If they agree to try they don't regret it because it's good food and if they feel like they are going to die because there was no meat, they can eat whatever they want going back home. If they don't want to go to a vegan restaurant then we just think of a place that everybody likes and has vegan options. There is so much food choice in china is impossible not to find places that fit for everybody.

But I also realize it's difficult to know what they use when cooking in most of the restaurants so it's impossible to be 100% vegan. But when I'm with other people I try to do this exception to not make it too complicated. When I'm alone I go most of the time to vegan restaurants or cook at home.

So in my opinion if you are vegan for ethical, health reasons then do what you think is right and don't bother what others say. You are not doing anything wrong and people should "admire" you for doing the right thing. And that's what happens most of the time anyway.

Here is a link to most of the vegan restaurants:
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On Yuantong street (圆通街) very close to the zoo entrance and close to the temple entrance you have a vegan store than sells many kinds of frozen and not frozen vegan meat, snacks, sauces, etc. not very expensive.

Also on Yuantong street you go on the direction to the lake and just before going down the big hill you turn left on a small street that goes up. Around 200 meters up on the left you will see a small vegan store selling biscuits, small cakes and also some of that vegan meat. It's not amazing but very cheap and they have many stuff that I like.

And you can also check Taobao. Many vegan things there. Now you can find vegan cheese and vegan mayo.

Hope this was useful
Cheers

@Encrypted 'Tolerant, intelligent, nice people will always understand'
Guess I'm none of those after just coming back from my double whopper in BK lol

All the things about must toast with alcohol I've not seen as real, my Chinese in-laws just told me to replace it with water and everything's fine.

I guess not eating meat or drinking boos in China is like not taking bong hits or drinking coffee in America. You'll never really be part of the team unless you partake in the festivities.