Forums > Living in Kunming > How does one meet nice Chinese women? Being the only woman in this discussion is not very easy, but since this discussion seems imbalanced I'd like to share my opinion.
Someone said:
"I find that Western women tend to want an ideal of a man — the perfect man — who has the right line and does the right things. If I approach a Western woman, I am supposed to speak just the right lines, be funny, say just the right jokes, stand the right way, pose the right way, and have just that right sentence or word. But Chinese women, if I am just friendly and natural, they will talk to me. That is the main difference to me."
I was in the States just for holiday, so I can only talk about "approaching European girls", but this is the most stupid thing I heard so far. Have you spoken to one of your female friends about it? Im pretty sure, they could have given you some advice for the next date. It's just another way of saying that you dont know how to approach girls and are very insecure. The difference with Chinese girls, the ones without rich laowai experience, is that they think this (what seems weird to Westeners) behaviour is typically foreign. Some of them also dont bother too much, as the foreigner can provide them with other things (not meant in a negative sense).
I have a couple of very good friends who came to China for job reasons or for studying. They all have Chinese girlfriends/wives now and Im very happy for them as they never had a real relationship back home since I can remember.
So, where did my friends find their girlfriends/wives?
1. at University in China and back home
2. Language exchange in China and back home
3. When travelling around China
4. at work (the girl used to be his translator)
For me a looser laowai is someone who comes to China, finds a Chinese girlfriend, makes her pregnant and then forces her to have an abortion, because he already has a family back home or doesnt want to take responsibilty. Then these guys go onto the next Chinese girl and it starts all over again. Some of them are even so kind to pay for the medical expenses.
And finally, why me and my girlfriends are not attracted to Chinese men. We all had Chinese boyfriends though and I only speak from our experience. In terms of physical attraction, most Chinese men have the body figure of an adolescent back home. But, look is only one part of attractiveness. In terms of character and personality, there are three groups of Chinese men. One is submissive, bossy/imperious and the thrid group is "I want a foreign girlfriend trophy". The second and third groups are the worst. We experienced things like "Can you put on some sunblocker?! I want you to stay white", 'I want sex now' ' I dont want to' ' I dont care, I want. You are my girlfriend, so it's your duty to make me happy', 'I want to get married next year and I want to have a son', 'I dont care if you want to leave me, I wont let you leave me. I know your passport number and I have proof that you worked illegaly in China". And so on. When you break up, they will stalk you, call your friends, show up at your house and workplace, call you so often that you need to change your number and your email address. Two of my friends went back home, because of them. Some of the Chinese guys even had degrees from Western universities.
Kunming launches first sightseeing bus
发布者@Alien: I was referring to fuel powered vehicles.
Kunming launches first sightseeing bus
发布者If I hadnt seen the bus today, one would think it's a joke. There is no need for a sight seeingbus. You need sights in order to have a sightseeing bus. Polluted lakes, construction sites, 'a village of tents' where builders sleep and the 2nd ring road are no sights. In cities like London and Paris it makes sense, because you can take photos of the Eiffel tower and Big Ben and so on. But here you cant see anything of the sights while sitting on the bus.
But this will only create more, definitely not needed, pollution when driving around all day long. I mean Higer is a Chinese brand. That means outdated, non environmental friendly technology. The red ribbon and the fancy colour dont help. The money the government spent on it could be better used for other things.
Kunming opens province's first 'baby refuge'
发布者@ Ocean: Just have a look on the Law of the People's Republic of China on Maternal and Infant Health Care, "Chapter II Pre-marital Health Care"
" Article 8 Pre-marital medical examination shall include the examination of the following diseases: genetic diseases of a serious nature; target infectious diseases; and relevant mental diseases."
It's not definite and leaves too much room for interpretation. So it can also apply for colour blind people, people with learning difficulties, people with big moles or large port-wine staines or any other kind of "diseases" that could be passed on the offspring. Doesnt matter whether it's actually from the medical point of view (Western standarts) hereditary or not.
And "Article 16 If a physician detects or suspects that a married couple in their child-bearing age suffer from genetic disease of a serious nature, the physician shall give them medical advice, according to which the said couple shall take corresponding measures." (abortion/sterilization)
www.chinalawedu.com/[...]
Anyway, there are a lot of good reasons to leave the baby in the 'baby refuge'. Most of them doesnt have anything to do with whether you want to be a mother or not.
Kunming opens province's first 'baby refuge'
发布者It seems most people dont know anything about single mothers in China.
Here are two good article that sum it up:
www.globaltimes.cn/content/790393.shtml
www.theguardian.com/[...]
On top, without marriage certificate technically you are not allowed to have children. They have to pay huge fines on an annual basis, the child doesnt get a hukou. It was even big on the news the other day. A mother in Hubei couldnt afford to pay the fines and the father was unwilling to marry her, so the 8 year old girl is still not able to go to school and so on.
Besides, the marriage law says:
"Article 6 No marriage may be contracted before the man has reached 22 years of age and the woman 20 years of age."
"Article 7 No marriage may be contracted under any of the following circumstances:
(2) if the man or the woman is suffering from any disease which is regarded by medical science as rending a person unfit for marriage."
Besides, the Chinese government offers a little financial bonus for every woman who gets sterilized after her 1st child.