Ok, I'll go first.

educatedman's review of O'Reilly's. The only thing missing from this one is the suggestion that an Irish pub isn't really an Irish pub without a leprechaun.

"I was recently chatting with a friend who mentioned a great cozy little place on Wenlin Jie for pizza and salads and before he could say the name, I knew it was Game Cafe.

With a very fairly priced menu, especially the free coffee thrown in with your meal (deal not available Saturdays)"

How can you go past this though? Its pure Gold!

yeah, spotted that one too. sounds like an info-mercial.
thanks for playing along, man!

and the onions are chopped with a ginsu knife that can cut through steel-toed construction boots!

the pizza is oilier than my hair, and my smile, and my personality!

A personal favourite:

"I was craving for some Indian food when my friends suggested that we should go to the newly opened Indian restaurant, SARAMATI for lunch. (...) ONLY RMB30 per person!! ONLY RMB 30???!!!! I couldn't believe my eyes!!!"

yeah, 56 exclamation marks in one review. HA HA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The more exclamation points, the more likely that the review is, in fact, genuine.

really? oh, i didn't see it that way. maybe you're right.

worst service in the known universe!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

haha, educatedman is my new hero!

the owners sit around playing mahjongg all day!! lazy bums!!!
watch out for the waitress with the scar!!! she seems to be on PMS all the time, no matter what time of the month you visit!!!! she's possessed by the devil!!!