here's some advice from someone with 42 failed relationships behind his belt.
my ex-gf back home was paying half the rent. but she was also hitting me up for lavish holidays to europe, which i couldn't shell out for.
there's no harm in asking people for their opinion, but ultimately you and your partner in crime need to be happy with the arrangement or it will be just another issue to fight about / be discontent about.
and if there's problems in other areas in addition to fighting about who pays for what, then you'll be posting an ad for a new roommate or no-strings attached one night of fun in the gokm classifieds soon.
Haha, there are no problems in other areas, she often pays for stuff, I was just curious about other people's stories.
This is a very deep subject. After over 35 years in Asia, which includes HK, Philippines, Thailand and China (all whilst being employed) it does stand out (read any SE Asia Forums) that the women in a foreign relationship expects not only the foreigner to pay for most things domestic, but also to pay towards the girls family.
This is where the issue lays here in China. It is accepted that a chinese girl, with family values living unmarried with a foreigner is akin to a whore. Now questions YOU need to ask of yourself. Are you happy living with a female who is recognized by her own country people as low class, peasant and possibly a whore ?
If you are then so be it, but be prepared to be ostracized by common folk, whilst your little peasant lovely who is classified by her neighbours as a whore, will milk you dry.
Of course all over China there is multiculture I know many well educated foreigners residing in China are married to well Western Educated girls and they are really happy and content. As for those who chose the lower class of women . BEWARE
@Lightning: by 'foreign relationship' you must be referring only to relatively well-off westerners, right?
As for the mores of living with a Chinese woman, it's not that simple - times and attitudes are changing.
'Being milked dry' is not what always happens, but when the westerner concerned has more bread than the wife's family, it seems to me that helping to support them is not uncalled for.
I find your prejudice against 'a lower class of women' offensive.
What do you mean by 'Western Educated' and 'well educated'?
@Alien, you seem to know everything.
Do you actually have a family or do you just sit around philosophizing about it?
@Magnifico: I just sit around philosophizing about it. However, my responses to Lightning are not philosophical and don't have to do with having or not having a family.
The family issue becomes relevant if you marry. However, if your g/f has brothers, they will normally be expected to bare the largest part of the cost.
Why? Because the wife is seen as becoming part of the husbands family. However, the one child policy has muddied the waters on this one. My wife come from a larger family that pre-dates the one child policy. Her brothers are taking the main responsibility.
If a local girl dating a foreigner is considered a "whore" I wonder what they think about local guys dating foreign girls.
